Uncommonly Bitchy

I’ve been blogging since 2002. In that time, I think you’ll agree, I’ve never really been a bitchy blogger. I don’t call people out for stupidity. I don’t attack. In general, I just meander among a few well-loved blogs, and stay in my own happy little backyard, bothering nobody.

So you know that when I found the blog today – the one written by the sassy fat-proud woman – I approached with the non-judgementalness that I approach all blogs and all people in general. Within three minutes, I knew I would never come back.

The blog is not difficult to find. She is nothing if not prolific. All she talks about is how awesome she is and how she has 36,000 Twitter followers. I don’t – I have less than 1,000 but I’m happy with that. As I said, I don’t go prostituting myself out for followers. So anyway, between her breathless descriptions of having 36,000 Twitter followers, she begged for money because she didn’t want to work. And she wanted some company to buy her a new MacBook Pro. Buying one seems completely outside her experience.

And she talks about her “brand” a great deal. Her brand. Like she’s Coca Cola.

The internet is vast. There is plenty of room for her, and junky SEO bloggers, and blogs about Enron and Hello Kitty and politics and technology and whatever else. No problem with her being online and writing whatever she wants to write.

But I would caution anyone from becoming so immersed in his/her own blog that she fails to see she doesn’t really have 36,000 friends, and people who comment on your blog aren’t your friends, and your little slice of the pie is nothing compared to the real world. Your brand means nothing. Nobody cares if you get a company to buy you a new MacBook Pro.

I say this because I fear becoming exactly like her.

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  1. I love your blog, and if you ever become obsessed with yourself or refer to youself as a “brand” I’ll send you a link to this post. And request that you slap yourself. :)

  2. Cara Ellison says:

    THANK YOU! And I can promise I would definitely slap myself. I hope it never comes to that!

  3. You would NEVER become that woman! Having said that, I’d buy you a Mac Book Pro if I could! ;)

  4. Cara Ellison says:

    Luckily, I have a pretty new MacBook Pro. I LOVE IT!!! : )

  5. David MacKenzie says:

    Does this mean the Cara Ellison ball caps aren’t going to be available for the Christmas season this year?


  6. I’m going semi-anonymous on this, because I have Things To Say.

    I’ve read this lady’s blog for at least six or seven years. I found her, like I found most of the infertility blogs I read, through Chez Miscarriage and her “vagina posse.” At first, I really liked her voice, and I suffered right along with her during her journey to become pregnant and through the loss of her twin boys, and I rejoiced with her when she gave birth to her daughter.

    I still read her every day. She couldn’t be more different from me politically, but that goes for a LOT of the “mommy bloggers” that I read. (Most conservative mothers are fundy homeschoolers with a gigantic pro-life chip on their shoulders, and frankly, that disturbs me more than some liberal hippie earth mama who breastfeeds until toddlerhood.) And I think sometimes she’s funny, and she writes superbly. She doesn’t raise my hackles too much, and her kid is adorable, so I keep on keeping on with her on my personal blogroll.

    However. . .

    When I signed up for Twitter, she was one of the first people I followed. (I pretty much follow the Twitter feeds of everyone whose blog I read regularly.) Then I followed her husband, whose blog I *don’t* read regularly. From the time I’ve read her — again, six or seven years — he has never worked outside the home. From what I can tell from his political rantings on Twitter, he believes that he should be able to do his “life’s work,” which is slam poetry, and we, the taxpayers, should pay for him to do it.

    Listen, I know the importance of the arts in every day life. I love music, and art, and acting, and all that stuff, but really? If you can’t make enough money doing it to support yourself and your family? Get a freaking job. I’m sure your fragile artiste psyche can suffer for 8 hours a day in an office until you get discovered at Sal’s Coffee Shop in West Philly and go on the nationwide Def Slam Poetry Jam. GOD. He just makes me so mad. He had an exchange on his blog with a woman who said she worked at a job she hated because it had good health insurance, and that that was a sacrifice she was willing to make to, you know, BE AN ADULT. He eviscerated her because she was “selling out,” and that “you shouldn’t have to do something you hate just for benefits.” Really, dude? That’s what EVERYONE DOES. Why do you think they call it WORK?

    He, like most liberals, expects us to pick up the tab for his life choices. HE doesn’t want to work — because he’s a POET, natch — so those of us who do get up and go to a job can pay for him to sit on the internet, bitching. No thanks.

  7. Cara Ellison says:

    I’m “really” a novelist. In fact, I only just now noticed your awesome post because after I got home after twelve hours at the office, I started my second job, writing. And now it’s almost midnight and I have another half hour to write and I’m started to panic a little. Do I sleep so I can go to work reasonably fresh? Or do I write so I can actually write – which is my life’s passion, the thing that keeps me up at night, the reason I was born? The thing that satisfies to my soul to the deepest levels?

    I go to bed. Because without my day job, nothing else matters. Gotta get to work, work my ASS OFF, put up with a boss who occasionally makes me insane, coworkers who are very vocal about their disagreements, and all the other hassles of real life.

    It’s called being an adult – just as you say.

    The kind of person who doesn’t do that isn’t necessarily a bad guy — unless he wants me to pay for his lifestyle, at which time I lose my everloving mind.

    How awful. That is exactly the kind of person I can never respect.

    Like I’ve said, I don’t know the woman, I don’t read her blog. My heart goes out to her.

    But now I feel like she has a crappy husband.

  8. When you used to talk about your “brand,” I just assumed you meant that iron thing you had heating up in the fire.

  9. Cara Ellison says:

    Do you think I like it when you make do that to you?

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